The Check-oot Quine's Lament
Blackhall, Sheena
Tatties, neeps, an ingin,
Poother fur the wash,
Wullie's needin new sheen,
Grip, skyte, flash.
Sweeties, ale, some flooer,
A tinnie wi a bash.
I'm wirkin like robot,
Grip, skyte, flash.
Safties, glaisses, bacon,
Intment fur a rash,
Ma hoose is like a midden,
Grip, skyte, flash.
Mealie jimmies, ganzie,
Cheque, or card, or cash,
Ma dowp is dottled sittin,
Grip, skyte, flash.
Aathin's in a hurry,
Fowk in sic a hash,
Customers,anonymous.
Grip, skyte, flash.
A trolly like Ben Nevis!
Michty fit a fash!
I'm scunnert an I'm foonert.
Grip, skyte, flash.
Noo ma shift is endin.
Beans an orange squash.
Hame tae dee the hoosewirk
Up, oot dash!